I am tired of all the compassion I am trying to spread around the people I love. No! Its more accurate to say “I am exhausted by all the compassion…”
I know how important it is to be compassionate. Being compassionate to others and being compassionate to myself is very important for healing. At the moment I feel like there is not much more I can give. I am exhausted.
One of the key-sentences of Guruji is:
“Self-acceptance is the key to healing” – I think he is very right. Looking inside myself confirms it as often as modern western science does. Just google for it to understand.
I am running out of words to express my sadness, sympathy and grief for you and for them (at least if they didn’t want to go).
I am not thinking or speaking about anybody in particular. I suffered the loss of quite many losses during my life too, but luckily not anybody recently.
Thank you, but what’s your point?
My point is that they probably didn’t have the luck or chance to experience and learn what I experienced and learned here in Bali.
Having the pleasure of meeting Guruji Gede Prama was just one of the pleasures I mean. The longer I didn’t experience him, the more I learn about his incredible wisdom and the honor I experienced to talk to him in private.
For me, always being critic, cautious and sceptic, it was kind of a strange experience at first, but he got confirmed almost everywhere I looked. No matter if its the modern (western) science or already known and respected and accepted teachers like his holiness the Dalai Lama.
But why are you still not healthy?
I guess its just because of me. Gede Prama showed me the way, but I have to go the way alone. Too much self-hatred and a weird lack of motivation are blocking me. They only come from inside me and are part of the way.
MS isn´t expainable. Nobody knows where its coming from, nobody knows where it may lead to, nobody knows how hard he or she will suffer from it. Maybe the biggest and most important enlightenment I learned in that year in Bali now, is that its affected hugely by ones mindset.
So how do I change my mindset?
Hm. Easier said than done. But I think meditation and learning to love oneself are a good way to start.
Simply meditate and we get healthy again?
Unfortunately no, but it helps. Many other steps have to be done.